I’m a mean Girl!

Remember that movie called Mean Girls that launched Lindsay Lohan acting career? The basic premise of the movie is a bunch of teen girls who rule the school based on their popularity. In order to keep up said popularity they need to in flick emotional and sometimes physical pain on other students to show off their level of power. My level of mean girl is not that advanced. I would say I am a wanna be mean girl or secret mean girl. I am verbally abusive but I am mentally abusive. Example, on the infamous Facebook people post pictures of themselves and I read the replies of people giving the person’s picture positive feed back. My first thought is negative. These people must be humoring him/her because he/she don’t look as good as they extol. I ask myself what joy or what does this do when I do this. I don’t need to move up a social latter. I do it because of insecurities. In a sense it tells me that if he/she isn’t perfect then I don’t have to compete with them. The insecurity is that of being good enough. As a recovering mean girl I am going to start with myself and not be so mean to me. That is going to be hard. I have read books on mindfulness, meditation and kindness. In Buddhism, you are taught to show kindness to all creatures big or small. It is the hardest thing to grasp. Everything I have to be kind too. I strongly dislike things like birds, ant hills, caterpillars etc.. I have to show kindness to all of things even when they don’t show kindness to me. That is where the mindfulness and meditation comes in. But first I will start with myself. As stated in the movie the “Help”. “You are smart you are kind and you are Important” Roxy.

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